Missing Mother

Releasing the Pain of Childhood Abandonment, Neglect, and Rejection

Quiz: The Right Inner Sanctuary For You

Building an inner sanctuary, a safe space where we can retreat in difficult times, is very helpful. It restores emotional balance and peace of mind. Find out what kind of imaginary environment is right for you.

We all need an inner retreat, a place within where we can go when we are longing for safety, peace, or emotional renewal. It is helpful to build (imagine) this space before we really need it, so we know where to go in times of emotional turmoil.

Let me help you with this little quiz to find the environment that is exactly right for you.

What describes you best?

a) You don’t like “too much” of any kind. That includes clutter, noise, chatter, people, thoughts, and actions. “Too much” drains you. You prefer “nothing”, and you would describe yourself as hypersensitive.

b) You feel unsafe, lost, and thrown into a dangerous world. You love touch and closeness, and you long for being held and contained. You need protection, and you like gentle, but clearly defined boundaries around you.

c) You are stuck in a daily routine; you feel exhausted, tired, bored, and colorless. What you are craving is renewal, a source of fresh, vibrant energy, something that moves and makes you feel alive again.

d) You feel like sitting in a cage with clipped wings. Your life is nice and comfortable, but there is something important missing: You want to be free; you want to know who you really are and what you can achieve, even if that means a less secure existence.

e) You are in constant emotional turmoil, feeling overwhelmed, angry, panicky, and whatever else makes your life miserable. High energy all the time, but it is of the negative and destructive kind. All you want is sanity and calmness.

Here are suggestions for an inner sanctuary:

If you are a)
A still pond in the middle of endless, golden grassland; a single, small tree, and a wooden bench. You are sitting on this bench, looking into the pond. There is a sense of utter peace and contentment around you.

If you are b)
A cozy cave in the hills, padded with soft moss. When you are safely tucked away in there, you can see the opening. Outside the cave is a guard at all times, for example an angel, a strong animal, or a person you trust completely.

If you are c)
You are standing in an emerald green pool under a giant, roaring waterfall. The water gushes down on you, taking your breath away. A herd of wild horses is galloping by.

If you are d)
You are standing on the grassy top of a high mountain, looking over the whole mountain range. There is an eagle right above you in the sapphire blue sky, dancing in the breeze. You feel strong and free.

If you are e)
You are resting in a hammock or very comfortable lounger in your secret garden. It is surrounded by natural stone walls that are covered with wild, pink roses. Their delicate scent is soothing. You hear the trickling of a little fountain. It is so very quiet and peaceful.

Customize your place until it feels just right for you. Go there often.
May inner peace be with you.

© 2010 Carna Zacharias-Miller

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